So I spend a lot of my time thinking about Ikea furniture, weird I know, but I'd say in an average week I come into contact with it at least fifteen times, and that's being conservative. Most people own at least one Ikea cube, or a set of malm drawers, and some people have essentially furnished their entire lives from within the walls of the big blue box.

I have many opinions on Ikea, most of which I will likely share on my blog throughout the course of this year, as I say, I think about it a lot. But as a starting point, rather than judging Ikea, and talking about the fact that I think there is a fundamental problem with the culture of disposable furniture, I'm going to accept that most of us have some, it looks like it's hear to stay, and instead offer some advice on the do's and don'ts of buying and moving the stuff.

Here comes a big surprise for you; Ikea furniture is not great at being moved around. Shocker, I know. Anybody who has had "the pleasure", of relocating some, has likely knocked at least one of those spiky plastic connection thingy's out of the chip board, which crumbles like, well, an apple crumble, and can therefore never be screwed in the correct position again. Every time you change apartments, your Ikea furniture responds like a seasoned boxer, picking up a few more battle scars every time he enters the ring. By around bout number four, sorry I mean move number four, it's just about held together with a piece of masking tape, and a couple of old bunnings screws you found in the kitchen drawer, however it's so flimsy, you daren't leave a window open as anything more than a light breeze could bring it crashing down into a pile of rubble.

Let's remember that most of the Ikea furniture is made of chip board, and isn't designed to be built, unbuilt, and then built again. Ironically though, it is aimed at younger people who live in apartment buildings, and whom move frequently. I mean let's face it, who in their right mind would allow a company to make you drive out to an industrial park, walk through some horrendous show home that's supposed to make you feel like your life would be vastly improved if you had a desk wedged under a bunk bed in your bedroom, and then drop you out the other end into a warehouse, where you enjoy the pleasure of loading your awesome new lifestyle onto a trolley in a series of brown cardboard boxes, only to take home and build yourself for seventeen hours? Other than young people on a budget that is. Sorry I'm digressing aren't I? I'm supposed to be offering moving advice.

So the point is, Ikea furniture is crap at moving, and a lot of the people that buy it move all the time...

Tip 1. Likely to move soon or regularly? Think twice about buying bigger items that will need to be dismantled. You can pick up much better stuff second hand, made of real wood, or steel, or a range of other materials that aren't as bad for the environment, for half the price. So I say go with upcycling. It's way cooler to re-use furniture, share stuff, and create less waste, and it will make moving day less stressful for you.

Tip 2. If you do go with larger flat packed items. Then seriously consider whether buying it second hand is a good idea. It's likely to have seen better days. Remember, as I mentioned above, it gets worse with every move. It may need dismantling and re-building, have some missing parts, be very heavy and awkward to move around, and can get damaged in the moving process (unless you use somebody awesome like Van Dude! Prices).

Tip 3. What are the best and worst items? Well the beds are generally a safe bet, the majority of beds in the World require some level of dismantling and re-assembly anyway. Although the Ikea one's can be a bit annoying to build, they do seem to be a little more hard wearing.

The worst item you can ever try to move is flat-packed wardrobes. I constantly get enquiries asking whether I can pick up some ikea wardrobes from the 3rd floor of a tiny apartment building. Only the very small one's can be moved assembled. The medium sized one's will need at least the doors removing, and if theres lots of stairs they may fall apart. The large one's will need to be completely dismantled… Remember, the person on gumtree is giving them away for a reason. If it seems too good to be true, it probably is.

Tip 4. Moving Day. With items like drawers and shelves etc, remove any sliding elements that aren't fixed in place. It will make everything a lot easier to move, and as the unit frames don't have much strength, it means they aren't carrying any weight, so it's less likely to get damaged. Do not leave the drawers loaded with stuff, with some sticky tape holding them closed. It really is worth investing five minutes in sorting through your items and removing the drawers fully. Maybe it's an opportunity to de-clutter?

Tip 5. A word on sofa beds. Generally the bigger sofa beds require a lot of disassembling and re-assembling, factor this in to your moving time, or be prepared to do it yourself before your removalist arrives. If it is an L shape, it probably needs a bit of work. If you are buying one second hand, ask the seller to have it all disassembled ready for transportation when you arrive. It's pretty clear if something won't fit through a door. If it just looks like a 2 seat or 3 seat sofa, then thats ok. I usually tie in any moving parts to make life easier, but that's a quick job that's manageable on arrival.

Tip 6. Keep your Ikea tools. Don't worry so much about the instructions, they are available online, but Ikea do have a habit of designing things in an unusual way, and even though I have a tool kit with hundreds of tools, some items are impossible to construct without their little aluminium spanner!

Tip 7. If you need any advice. Call or email Van Dude. I'm happy to help!

One thing that I have learnt through being on the road with Van Dude 6.5 days a week for 2.5 years, is that there is very rarely such thing as an easy job. Despite this, the majority of enquiries I get say.."quick/easy/little job/20 minutes max - definitely straight forward". Now I appreciate that removalists have a reputation for trying to squeeze money out of people. I've heard stories of people being charged for stairs, being told that "no furniture will be unloaded from the truck until you speak to my boss and agree to pay extra", I even heard one person say that the removalist cornered her in the kitchen and forced her to sign a 'job completed' form, even though the job wasn't finished. So I get it right? The idea behind these enquiries is to try and negotiate the best price because people want the cheapest possible quote. Money is important to all of us, and it becomes particularly important when we are booking services - probably because we are heading into the unknown. I mean most things we spend our money on are fairly familiar... groceries, restaurants and cafes, pubs, fuel for our cars, rent or mortgage etc..but when a pipe bursts in our kitchen we don't really know how much it will cost to have a plumber come and fix it.

Obviously with Van Dude I am trying to alleviate some of that worry. The basic principles of the business are to be super accomodating, friendly, accountable, reliable, and generally pleasant and honest to deal with. This isn't rocket science, it's pretty simple stuff. Hopefully customers who have used Van Dude in the past can vouch for this, and are subsequently happy to refer me to friends...hence the slogan "The Man and Van you'd recommend to a friend!". But fairness works both ways, I will never knowingly be unreasonable to a customer and I expect the same in return. The reason I ask questions is because based on my experience not many jobs are straight forward. I am not trying to get you to pay more by making a job sound complicated, I am trying to pre-empt any potential pitfalls. One of my biggest frustrations is when I ask somebody questions about the job and they ignore them. For people who have done this to me in the past via text message, this will now explain why I stopped replying and didn't help you!

I think there is a theory that anybody can move furniture, because at some point in our lives most of us have done it. I mean who didn't carry an old sofa down the road when they were a student?! Like with most things in life you 'get what you pay for'...I know it isn't highly skilled work, but there is skill involved. I have seen enough airtaskers out on the road on Saturdays - moving furniture so horribly, that I can guarantee you that not everybody can do it! Not everything can just be shoved up the stairs with a bit of muscle, some things require specific tools, disassembling, taking the doors off, the right trolley, the right dolly, the use of bands to secure doors, a specific technique not to touch the walls or scratch the floor etc etc. I remember when my legendary offsider Tom started working for me. About 2 months into helping me a few times a week, he said "Ali, we haven't had one easy job yet...you said most jobs are easy"... See, even I do it!

So here's a few considerations for you to prepare for moving day. These may also be things worth mentioning when you're trying to get a competitive quote. These things will either help you work out how your furniture is going to be moved or give you some considerations when buying new or second hand items. Some will even save you money, remember the best way to save money on moving day is actually to be well prepared, if you invest a little time you won't have to invest as many $$.

1) Consider whether it's worth paying for 2 removalists. I know your mate is a personal trainer and goes to the gym 5 times a week. But that doesn't mean he's good at moving things? Experience is the best asset in this game and sometimes it's just worth paying for the extra pair of (experienced) hands.

2) You know that the cheapest guy's advertised are going to be the worst. You do, you know it, so why are you still contacting them? Book with somebody that has good reviews, you always get what you pay for. I always find it weird that people will spend $200 in the pub but not on moving house!

3) Sofas. Everybody loves big sofas. They're awesome. And comfy. But they also need to fit up your stair case or into your lift as well as through your door. So get the tape measure out and check the length. Consider your access as it is likely that the sofa will need to stand upright on the stairs. Check if it fits through the door on the smallest width of the sofa (usually on it's back). You may need to remove the feet to get it through so check the width without the feet, and have a quick look what tool is needed to take the feet off and whether it's straightforward.

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4) Fridges. Everybody loves big fridges. They're awesome. And look cool. Especially big stainless steel double door one's. But they also need to go up your staircase and fit into the allocated slot in your kitchen. (side note : always measure this slot at the bottom and the top as they are rarely square) As a general rule big fridges should be reserved for people in big houses, or people with ground floor access, or perhaps people with a slick apartment with a big lift. I'm sorry to break the news but you probably need something under 400 litres for the time being, maybe one day hey :) It's ok though, how much happier is a pretty fridge really going to make you?!

Removing the handles from a double door fridge

5) Ensemble beds. This is the name for the beds that come as a box and a mattress, that can't be dismantled. Just let the removalist know you have an ensemble and the size it is. It may not fit in your apartment so think about whether you have narrow access. Balconies are an awesome option for these as well.

6) Wardrobes. I've said it before and I'll say it again. Flat packed one's generally need to be disassembled. If you don't want to pay more then you will need to invest a couple of hours to dismantle them. Otherwise buy new one's and build them in the room.

7) Get the right packaging. It will cost a little at the start, but save you time on moving day! Look out for "epic box" which I'm launching later in the year. Stackable removal boxes dropped at your door. A zero waste alternative for easy moves.

8) Sofa beds. They are a lot heavier than sofas. Make sure you specify that it is a sofa bed when making an enquiry. It will probably need tying in, and the removalist will need to assess the access and weight of the sofa to work out how many people are required to move it. I know it may cost extra to pay for 2 people, but you don't want a serious back injury.

9) Parking. Even with small moves you need to consider where the van or truck will park. Help out by working this out prior to moving day. If there's a neighbours garage you can block, give them the heads up before moving day and nobody will get annoyed. Work out whether it's easier to come in the front or the back, and whether you'll need to wedge any doors open etc. Hold a parking space out front that the van can take when it arrives...This all speeds up moving day and saves you time, and saves me stress!

10) Glass. Glass is fragile. It can also be heavy. Most fragile things aren't heavy, and most heavy things aren't fragile... but glass has the combination. Consider bubble wrapping it neatly. Remove it from other furniture items to move separately. Treat it with care.

11) Empty your furniture. It makes it easier to move. So invest some time in it.

12) Dining tables. If you have a big dining table there's a good chance it doesn't fit through the door. So have a look if you need to take the legs off.

13) Just be honest and tell me what the job is, when you want to do it, and whether you want one or two people. I'll ask the relevant questions and please do me the honour of answering them. You don't need to tell me that it's a 5 minute drive from North Bondi to South Bondi, you don't need to tell me that your job is the easiest removal job of all time and you were going to carry the bed down the road because it's so close but your friend pulled out. I've heard them all before! :)

As I always say... I'm happy to offer any advice for free if you get in touch.

I'll finish with a simple maths exercise... If you pay someone $50 an hour and they sit in the truck smoking so the job takes 3 hours, or you pay someone $70 per hour and they smash the job out in 2 hours with a smile. Who has the cheapest rates? :)

Have a good one x

Moving our beloved IKEA furniture

Moving advice

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